Fat Ballerinas

at some point in our lives, each of us faces the loss of someone or something dear to us. the grief that follows such a loss can seem unbearable, but grief is actually a healing process. grief is the emotional suffering we feel after a loss of some kind. the death of a loved one, loss of a limb, even intense disappointment can cause grief.

my five stages

1. denial

there is nothing wrong with a healthy helping of denial when you are moving half way around the world and landing smack dab in the middle of a culture you are not used to. hey its fun, exciting, an extended vacation. it is not that different. they eat, sleep and poop just like me. oh but how subtle mole hills in one’s routine become, in perception, the Alps. the small differences have added up to a very large haystack on this camel’s back. the sweet haze of denial has been broken…



2. anger?
3. depression?

one wouldn’t think that moving could cause such a reaction…or could you? over the last month, some of you may have noticed that the pages of fatballerinas have been devoid of any new ramblings. unfortunately, i got out of the denial stage and went foot first into the steaming pile of depression or anger (or both). oh and the smell! knowing that you are not the sweetest smelling person to be around can be hard. so what now….

maybe…

4. bargaining

i wonder what strange bargains i will try to make with the devil or god. not sure how excited i am to jump out of the pot of depression into the frying pan.

or perhaps…

5. acceptance

whatever the case, i hope that you will not mind reading about it over the next few months. i know i will have a good laugh at my own expense one day. it doesn’t feel very silly now, but i can’t wait until it is.